Tuesday, October 13, 2009

Be(a)ware of Manhole...

I dreamed I was skating along a road that started to go downhill, when suddenly I fell into a manhole... I was then in a dark tunnel that quickly became narrower and narrower until it was crawlspace only... There was a very long trail of people behind me and a few in front of me... It was so dark and constricting, I could barely breathe and it was getting hotter and hotter... I was sure I was going to have a panic attack and hyperventilate or suffocate when finally we reached a small opening that led up to another manhole-- covered by a grate that I could see people walking over... I was so relieved to be near the front of the line so I could breathe the little bit of fresh air coming in from the manhole... but there were so many people behind me still suffocating in the dark... Then I noticed the silence. All these people behind me were on the verge of death yet nobody said a word, suffering instead in complete silence... Then I noticed that the few people in front of me who were actually close enough to the escape and had breath enough to cry out for help did not...! All I could think in my weakened condition was "...people are dying down here!...why are you not crying out for help?!"

Then I woke up...

It was one of the worst feelings I have ever experienced in a dream, and I believe I was allowed to feel it for a few reasons... to have deeper understanding of those who feel so deeply entrenched in a "manhole" they no longer have breath enough to cry out... to encourage those who do have breath and nearness enough, to cry out... and to not be, myself, as one walking over the grate unaware of the desperate need to help... but to cry out, myself, for those who, tragically, cannot...

Wednesday, October 7, 2009

Cliff Hanger...

Last night I dreamed I was on a cliff with a man from my past... The cliff was actually a small ledge on the side of a steep mountain overlooking a bottomless canyon... The man from my past was afraid of heights and was frozen solid against the wall of the mountain refusing to get near the edge of the cliff. I kept extending my hand to him reassuring him we would be fine but his fear of falling kept him paralyzed. Finally, I became exasperated trying to help him and said "Then what are we doing here?!" And with that, I flew away...

I then saw him from a higher vantage point... still standing alone on the ledge... and since it was not humanly possible to scale the steep mountain, the only escape from that ledge was death itself...

When I looked again I saw his clothes covered with graffiti...

Then for one brief moment I saw a friend of mine named James... and then I woke up.

After a moment, I realized that James represented the book of James and one very relevant verse I know by heart. James 1:27: "Religion that God the Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to care for orphans and widows in their distress, and to keep oneself unstained by the world." I slowly began to understand... The man from my past had been spiritually abandoned by his parents... leaving him distressed and stained by the world and ultimately a spiritual orphan... I reached out to him with 'pure religion' ...caring for him in his distress... but if he will not take the necessary leap of faith off that ledge... I can do nothing more...